Saturday, November 7, 2009

It aint all lemonade and skittles....

As some of you may know, I have had a bit of a battle with depression for the last couple of years. Well with a build up of work stress, little time to spend with my family and a heap of commitments weighing me down the black dog has reared its ugly head again.
By no means is this the kind of deep seated sadness that slapped me down and made me beg for mercy 18 months ago. It's more the lethargic, couldn't give a rats kind of feeling that makes getting off the couch hard and for me, reduces my tolerance levels to the negatives. I feel guilty for being grumpy, the guilt takes so much energy that I feel tired and the lack of energy stops me feeling as though I can work through it to feel good again. I am pretty lucky though.
With the help of family, good friends and a good psychologist I can see that the feelings are only temporary and I can get through them and regain my balance. I write about the good stuff here. The stuff like the riding, my son getting better and the good times we have as a family because well, thats the stuff I want to talk about. But I don't want anyone to think I don't have bad days. Life isn't all lemonade and skittles. It can get you down and make a day seem like a year but the trick is to grab those skittles when they are there and gobble them up. Take a swig of the lemonade to wash it down. Repeat.

5 comments:

  1. my thoughts and prayers are with you. Smile any chance you get it helps. Look into those little angel eyes of your kids and maybe this will help just a little. Remember we are all only human, don't be to hard on yourself.xx sonya

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks Sonya. I've got a pretty good handle on it these days. Perspective on the bad days and a good vent now and then seems to keep it at bay. I don't let it get the better of me anymore.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Looks like training/riding together isn't the only thing we share at the moment. Steve

    ReplyDelete
  4. Everyone seems to get a bad batch .... thanks for the chat the other day! Matt

    ReplyDelete
  5. You know I've been there, Wingy. All we can do is approach it one day at a time and try and remember all the good things we have in life.

    I miss riding with all of you guys so much. It is probably the only thing I really miss about Brisbane. I will keep track of your progress and you've motivated me to train for a race over here at the end of Feb. Take care. Bim

    ReplyDelete